Practice Relentless Honesty

Discover Your WHY

Read: Exodus 19:4-6, Ephesians


• You don't need more motivation. You need to know what drives you.

• Use this simple phrase to cut out the middle man & always follow through on your goals.


Most people pursue goals like this: They feel bloated and fat and ugly, so they make a goal to lose weight. They immediately start taking action to eat less and move more….

… For a few days or weeks.

But then they fall off, return to their normal eating habits, and re-start this cycle. One day they feel fat…

After a few turns of this wheel, they decide they’re just not motivated. If only they had more motivation, then they would lose weight.

You don’t need more motivation.

The fact that you’re here right now means you have all you need. What you really need is to connect what you want - to lose weight, move your body, eat healthier foods - with what drives you.

Today you’ll learn a simple phrase formula to eliminate always needing motivation. When you put this into practice, you cut out the middle man and connect directly to your heart. The payoff is that you’re no longer failing to follow-through because you’re no longer pursuing the things that you want for the wrong reasons or don’t want at all.

Instead, your life, your goals, and your pursuits make sense.

Today, you’ll discover your WHY. WHY do you want to lose weight, eat better, and cultivate health?

When we address our actions without connecting them to our deep driving truth, we’ll always fall short because we don’t know what we’re really aiming for and we don't know how to recognize success.

Does that make sense?

Results, goals, and efforts that don’t succeed or last usually have an extrinsic WHY - to please others, gain approval, or project perfection.

- I want to lose weight so others will think I’m pretty.

- I want to feel better so I’ll be confident at work around my peers.

- I want to lose weight so I can be the perfect mom, doing it all with a hot bod to match.

- I want to lean out because I’m ugly now.

Efforts that succeed and last connect to a deeper sense of purpose. Interestingly, I’ve noticed over the years of doing this work that these deeper WHYs usually connect to some form of presence, or living in this moment versus the past or the future.

- I want to lose weight so that I can play with my kids without getting out of breath.

- I want to exercise so that I can enjoy life to the fullest for as long as possible.

- I want to eat well so that I have more energy for my family.

Needing a strong WHY is biblical too.

God never asks us to do anything without first giving a compelling reason. Check out this passage in Exodus when God gives Moses the 10 Words…

You yourselves have seen what I did to the Egyptians, and how I bore you on eagles’ wings and brought you to myself.

Now therefore, if you will indeed obey my voice and keep my covenant, you shall be my treasured possession among all peoples, for all the earth is mine and you shall be to me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. These are the words that you shall speak to the people of Israel.”



God said, here’s what I’ve done for you. Because of this (the WHY), do these things (the action).

Throughout Ephesians we see Paul doing the same thing. In the first four chapters, he lists all the things God has done for them. He uses this phrase over and over, “For this reason (WHY)… I do these things (BEHAVIOR).” Paul then begins using imperative phrases in chapters 4 and following. He builds 4 chapters detailing what God has done and is doing and only then does he tell them what to do.

Let’s put it into practice, shall we?

The simple phrase to cut to the heart of your WHY

- so that x3 -

Look at your health, food, and/or fitness goals from yesterday’s exercise.

  1. Read your goal out loud (what you want accomplish) and,
  2. Add “so that” and finish the sentence.
  3. Do this 3x (at least) to dig deep enough for a juicy WHY.

For example, a healthy amount of muscle, the physique benefits, and needing to feel strong (and not be seen as weak) was what got me into lifting weights. As a little girl I was completely powerless over several things that happened to me and I know I’ve projected a lot of armor over the years, strength included, to combat how weak I felt. Those extrinsic reasons got me going down this exercise path.

But what has kept me going is deeper. Let’s put so that x3 into practice

Why is exercise important to you, Gerilyn?

I need to move my body so that I feel strong and capable.

I want to feel strong and capable so that I can participate in any physical activity with myself or friends and keep up, whether it’s running 3 miles (I don’t run) or hiking a 14-er.

I want to be ready for anything so that I know I am self-sufficient and to see what I’m capable of.

Take each of your goals and apply “so that x3” to reveal your true WHYs underneath the surface. When you know these, you don’t need the middle men anymore. You cut straight to the chase. I don’t work out to “look better” anymore. If that is a nice side benefit, great, but I train to expand my limits.

Knowing this changes how I approach exercise, how I plan for it, and what activities I participate in.

Maybe you want to get fit so that you can be more present with your kids, go on more outdoor adventures, or be able to do as much as you can for as long as you can. Maybe you want to lose weight so that you can keep up with the wee ones, enjoy your spouse, or feel good in your clothes.

Whatever it is, it is what gets you out of bed in the morning and connecting with it unfettered by should's and other external factors strengthens your purpose and propels you forward.

Digging Deeper:

  1. Share one of your 'so that x3s'
  2. What did you learn about yourself that surprised you?

Share your responses in the comments section below.

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